Week 9 – The Call Sheet

Hollywood Horror Show – No player media availability, skipping weekly radio hits and the “Caleb Williams should sit out the rest of the year” crowd is in full roar. Man, things aren’t always greener, huh Lincoln?

Cheaters always prosper – Unless you live under a rock, you’ve heard about the Michigan cheating scandal. First of all, let’s all collectively thank Connor Stallions for his service…and by service, I mean all this stupid spy shit he’s been up to. What a joker.

Secondly, was it all worth it? I mean did Michigan really have to go to these lengths to beat the likes of Rutgers, Indiana and Nebraska? Idk man. Maybe just be better.

Thirdly, every team does some version of this…you know, sign stealing. They just don’t use their own Venmo and credit cards and are a total narc about it. Never change, Michigan.

Michigan State’s unforced errors – It wasn’t enough that their now former coach decided to self-serve on a phone call with a famous sexual assault survivor, but now MSU is showing Adolf Hitler as part of trivia on the video board? You really can’t make this shit up.

Don’t take the cheese – You might think the Michigan cheating scandal is the most college football-est college football story this week, but you’d be wrong. No, that title goes to our beloved UTSA Roadrunners.

In an effort to keep his team from “eating the cheese” aka buying into the hype, UTSA head coach Jeff Traylor had his staff lay a bunch of mouse traps around the facility. But life is funny, and it was Traylor who actually got his hand stuck in the trap and saw his finger smashed. God, I love college football.

Salty Sundevils – I can confidently say that Arizona State is the best 1-6 team in the country. They only have one win (a three-pointer against an FCS team) but they’ve made life hell on USC, Colorado and Washington. That defense is legit, and something they can definitely move on moving forward.

Trouble for Texas? – Quarterback Quinn Ewers is officially out with a shoulder injury and yeah, man, we’re staring down the barrel of another Texas flameout. Look, they should be fine for a few weeks…but a game against KState looms and that won’t be a cakewalk. Curious to see how this plays out.

Topgun Toledo – On Saturday, Toledo topped other MAC favorite Miami Ohio to move to 7-1. Jason Candle really has the boys rolling and you’ve got a great chance to win the title this year. I’d bet we get a rematch of these two teams in Detroit.

Oklahoma vs. Kansas

This game is primarily about whether OU can remain undefeated, but unpredictably last week the Sooners really struggled against a not-great UCF team. You know, a team that can really run the ball and does some funky stuff on offense. *Ahem* Welcome to Lawrence, Sooners.

I do wonder if KU can get that good OU defense some things to question. Despite backup quarterback Jason Bean still leading the charge, the Jayhawks are still pretty frisky on that side. of the ball. They have a really strong run game and have been known to be some big-game hunters in recent years. KU is 5-2 and just narrowly lost to a suddenly red-hot Oklahoma State team last week–meaning I fully expect them to hang around and make this a game.

For OU, perhaps last week was a fluke. Perhaps they just got a little big-headed and needed some humbling. Or, maybe, just maybe, they’re nibbling on a Letdown Lookahead Sandwich (s/o The Solid Verbal) for that Bedlham Game next week. I guess we’ll find out soon enough.

Georgia vs. Florida

This feels like an ass-whooping waiting to happen, but last year, at times, Georgia played down to their opponents and I don’t think they’re immune to that this year. Please see the South Carolina game. And now with All-World TE Brock Bowers aka their safety blanket out for a while, I’m curious to see how they look on offense when things get tough.

And weirdly enough, Georgia just isn’t awesome at running the ball this year. It’s pretty strange. I wonder if Florida can shut down the run, force Carson Beck to make plays, and perhaps pull out all the stops on offense to swing for an upset.

Florida will, in all likelihood, have a really hard time doing much on offense in this game. While UF QB Graham Mertz has been somewhat decent this year, I have a hard time thinking he plays the game of his life to pull the upset. I’m expecting a low-scoring affair. But as things go with the World’s Largest Cocktail Party, I suppose anything can happen.

Oregon vs. Utah

Better QB? Check.

Better offensive weapons? Check.

A team full of 4 and 5-star talent that should definitely win this game? Check.

Good for you for using logic to think Oregon is going to win this game. Utah doesn’t abide by logic, in fact, they’re just an amphibious being that gets its head chopped off and the limbs just work harder.

Simply put, Utah makes no sense. They have a pig farmer backup quarterback and a converted safety-playing running back, and yet they just sandblasted Hollywood’s finest and looked primed to be a giant pain in the ass of every other team on their schedule. Kyle Wittingham just don’t miss, man.

Logic says Bo Nix and Bucky Irving should take care of business for the Ducks, but I’m just not sure. I really like Dan Lanning and I think Oregon is a high-quality team…and yet I’d still be very leery about picking against the Utes, even as heavy home dogs.

Miami OH vs. Ohio

The MAC East title race just might get decided on Saturday. No disrespect to Buffalo–who is still very much in the race–but I think the winner between the Redhawks and Bobcats will take the cake.

If you like quarterback play, this is the game for you. Furthermore, if you like quarterback lineage, this is also the game for you. The Gabberts versus the Rourkes. Not quite the Montagues and the Capulets but close enough.

Just do yourself a favor and take the time to watch or tune into this one. Although I wish this was an upcoming MACtion Wednesday night doozy, Saturday will just have to do.

Oregon State vs. Arizona

OSU-Arizona just screams fun. Two physical teams. Two powerful offenses. And two teams that are trying their damnedest to stay in the thick of it in the bowl and Pac-12 races, respectfully.

For the Beavs, it’s all about running the ball and pounding down the opponent. I’m a big Jonathan Smith guy, and I just really enjoy how he constructs his teams. They’re always a good watch and really tough to compete against.

On the other side, Arizona made a quarterback switch thanks to injury and have just not looked back. Since making the switch to Noah Fafifta, they’ve beaten Stanford and Wazzu and made life very hard for USC and Washington. The Wildcats are a frisky wildcard team, which makes them perfect for a late-night Pac-12 After Dark-type game. Should be a good one.

+6.5 Miami OH vs. Ohio – This will be a close-call kind of game.

Mississippi State vs. Auburn OVER 43 – These offenses kind of suck but I think this number is an overreaction.

Colorado vs. UCLA UNDER 64 - UCLA actually has a solid defense and I think they’ll limit some of CU’s scoring.

Oregon State vs. Arizona OVER 56 – I like both teams to score their fair share here.